What I’ve learned about facebook –

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Actually, it’s what I’ve learned without facebook.  A week and 2 days ago I signed off of facebook with no warning or notes to my “friends” or family.  I decided to do so because I realized that with the plethora of friends I have on facebook, how many are really friends?  If I disappeared for a month would anyone notice?  Would my phone ring or my email traffic increase?  Would someone show up at my door to see if I was okay?

A week and 2 days later and the answer is no.  I’ve decided that I don’t want to rely on facebook to hear and share important news.  The catapult you ask?

  • I learned that my (half) sister’s father passed away through a facebook post last week.  I saw a simple post that said, “Rest in peace daddy, I love you”.  How about a phone call?  Maybe a text message?
  • I had an “event” planned through facebook and had several RSVP’s.  I purchased food and drink enough to accommodate the group, gave up my season opener ticket to the Jacksonville Jaguars, not to mention the time and energy I put into the multiple communications and reminders, setting the house up and the hostess’s time. Never mind the dozens that couldn’t take 5 seconds to RSVP at all, but those who DID RSVP didn’t show up. No kidding – not one.    Thanks “friends”, thanks facebook.

My point is;  I don’t want my relationships, my events, my family communications, etc. to be dictated by a faceless, impersonal piece of technology.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m not boycotting facebook.  I’m just taking a break, a trial separation.

Here’s the kicker — all but one of my family members (aside from my children), live out of state.  I’ve seen my mother and grandmother once in the last few years – in 2009.  I last saw my brother and his 8 kids in 2005.  So needless to say, I’ve relied on facebook to communicate and stay in touch with family.  I’ve connected (through facebook) with cousins, aunts and uncles, nieces and more that I haven’t seen or spoken to in years.  I love facebook and the connections it allows you to have, but not when it’s the only connection you have.

I’d like to believe that if anyone misses my status updates, updates on my kids, new pictures, or important information, they will call me.  I would also like to believe that if there was something important going on that I should know about that my phone would ring.  Is this too much to ask?

What are we doing on facebook anyway?  Looking at the profiles from our high school friends that we never talk to (guilty)?  Looking at ex-girlfriends or ex-boyfriends and seeing who they are with and what they are up to?  Creeping on our kids (guilty)?  Posting only our most flattering pictures so that we can paint a picture of how great we look (guilty)?  Seeing where people are “checking-in” and who they are with (guilty)?  What about when your significant other “friends” an unknown member of the opposite sex?  “Who is this person and why have I never heard of them before if they are such a great friend??”  Sound familiar?  How about, “Since when are you and Ashley friends??  You were just talking smack about her!” to which the response is likely, “Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.” (**insert evil laugh here**)

Yes, though it may be short lived and though it’s a tough habit to break, I’m staying away for a little while.  If you’re reading this and you’ve missed me, you know my number.  If you don’t know my number….well, you know the rest.

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4 responses

  1. Ummm…I call “bullshite”..!! I’VE emailed, texted AND called so yes….someone DID notice. ;p xoxo

    • Ah yes, you (and one other) texted, called and emailed, but didn’t know that I was no longer on facebook until I told you. Which is my point. I talked to you regularly – our “only” connection is not through facebook, so you are excluded from the rant above. Most of my family and the majority of the “friends” on facebook and I have a facebook only relationship – or so it seems.

  2. @TamaraJam First of all miss thing…. You posted pics on Facebook at nearly midnight Sat. Your tweet informing that you weren’t using Facebook came Monday. We all know I was at the beach all day Sunday so wasn’t browsing FB to notice your day and a half of being missing. However, I too was calling, texting and in search of communication from my DK!  I Recently was about to come knock your door down and demand the whereabouts of your body….if you didnt respond to my several attempts to reach you. Side note… Do you really want to talk to all your Facebook friends on the phone everyday?  I know I sure don’t. I love you and you ate missed!!! Come back to FB!!!!! MUAH!!!!

    • Tonia – you are (and one other) mentioned above in my reply to the Taminator. You and Tami, both of whom I talk to “outside of facebook” are excluded. Notice that my blog said I didn’t want facebook to be my “only connection” with people. It’s not with the two of you and so you are excluded 🙂 I’ll be back on fb in a month or so (maybe).

      Besides – according to all the posts on Twitter, the new facebook is not so great 😉